you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
