I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
