I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
