i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
