I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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