is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
