So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
