Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
