So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
