your parents love me but you hate me
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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