How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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