needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
