It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
should my penis look like a turkey
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
