you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
