Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
