I think i sorta joined a cult last night
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
tell me about the eggs
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
