I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
