That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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