Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
