We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
