woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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