why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
