Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
