now i know why i became what i already was.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
