nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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