So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
