Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
