You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize
