Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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