Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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