The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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