How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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