He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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