Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
