I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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