We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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