And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
