there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Are we still banned from the library?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
