I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
