guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
