Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Randomize
