Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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