I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
