So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
