NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
