Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
