i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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