Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
