3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
