Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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